Lousy.

Hot on the heels of me trying to think of a way to make some extra money, just so I’m not continuing to go out backwards…I overheard CEF talking to someone about his horses…the fact that he’s spent about twenty grand on them in the last couple of years. Twenty grand! Makes me feel nauseous.

The ride on mower that I paid for…that I recently bought a new battery for needs new blades. He just said quote “You get em and I’ll get a new belt for it.” Now I wouldn’t even know if he gets a new belt for it…but of course the belt is maybe, at the most, $40. The blades will cost me upwards of $80. I’ve just looked online.

Now, yes, considering I bought the bloody thing – top of the range – golf course type.. Because that’s what he always wanted, yeah, just defies belief that he can spend all that on his horses…and yet not contribute one lousy cent to the insurances, maintainance, groceries etc – not even his bloody Foxtel.

I know. Ask him for money.

I have.

The answer?

“I’ll fuckin buy me own groceries!” He doesn’t.

“Turn the fuckin thing off!” ( he’d be more horrible, really horrible, without the races, than he is with them)

Nothing I’d say, nothing, makes an impact or changes him – only for the worse – I know that for a fact.

*One of the latest crazy men, the one who stabbed that young doctor, apparently told her that he loved her, within the first week of knowing her. This apparently is one sign of a sociopath. Just one.

CEF told me he loved me within days of us meeting. I thought it was lovely. Such a wonderful thing to hear. And aren’t I the special one to evoke such feelings in someone? I was over the moon…especially after being cheated on by my husband of many years.

Yeah.